Monday 28 February 2011

Had a Visitor

Belle Dog
It's been quite a while now since the black dog came to visit. Which makes it even more of an appalling shock. A week ago, night three in my lovely new flat, I suddenly started panicking and have been a in a state of terror since. It's illogical, it's crippling, it's my old friend come for a visit. I've been down at my Mum's since wednesday and have an appt later this week to see the Consultant who put me on the right road last time. In the meantime I'm just hanging on by my fingertips and trying to keep food down. I'm incapable of doing much else - it's taken me a week to actually blog.

13 comments:

bagqueen said...

Hey I just found your new blog after months of not checking and I see you are now single, I'm sad for you and I know we've never met but your were one of the 1st people I found on tinternet! on your podcast originally. Its weird this cyber thing isn't it we or maybe just me feel a closeness that doesn't really exist! Anyway I shall check more often cos my life isn't so hectic and I always enjoy your makes. I'm loving the latest sock wool cardi, I loved the original that I saw on rav. You take care of you. Love xx

Knit Kat said...

Hi Lixie, so sorry you're not well. I hope that you will be better soon. We will try our best to brighten you up at Skip North - just think of all that yarn - it must help you a little at least!!!

suse-the-slow-knitta said...

(hugs)
the black dog is not man's(or woman's) best friend.
You must have been all keyed up and excited about the new flat,& running on adrenaline. Then you settle into the flat, and the adrenaline has gone and in your fragile state plummet back down again.
Be kind to yourself, look at pretty things and you will be back up again.

Rosie said...

Blimmin' black dog. Hope the consultant helps, meantime, hang in there.

KnittyLynn said...

Aw hon. I wish I could wrap you in a warm red polka dotted blanket and give you a cuppa.
Hang in there and get many hugs from Mom.

Ynot said...

It's good you have your mother's support (I'm assuming, because you are staying with her) and that you have what sounds to be a good Consultant. It's a tough road. And really not helped by how little understood it is by people in general. Surround yourself with those you care about who also will NOT ever tell you to "Just get a hold of yourself and buck up." Those of us out here reading your blog are rooting for you!!

Becky said...

Oh no - I'm so sorry to hear that - what a shame. Take good care of yourself and take your time getting better. Thinking of you honey bunny. xxxxx

PURLPOWER said...

Hey man, that is shitty. Hope the meeting with the consultant goes well. Thinking of ya.

knittingsal said...

Love reading your blog, and all about your life, thinking about you and sending you a hug (even though it's a bit odd to hug a random stranger), but you feel like a friedn. All the best Sally x

Heather Cawte said...

{{{{{hugs}}}}}

Thinking of you.

Anonymous said...

I hate it when the heaviness (as I call it) visits me too. But it always goes away again and I know the black dog will for you too. Hang in there!
xx Katie

Squiblet said...

It may not help much but I eat a banana every day as they have stuff in (I forget what) that helps make serotonin/happy chemicals in your brain. And although I don't like bananas very much it also makes me feel like I have a tiny amount of control over my black doggedness. If you don't love them either, you can always blitz them with strawberries or something else nice in a smoothie! xxx

PurlaP said...

Be kind to yourself Little Lixie ~ the dog has been in my yard for quite sometime now and to keep him at bay I read inspiring blogs (Brave Girls Club) and think that if I am half the woman my friends think I am then I can't be too bad ! Sending hugs across the pond {{{{{}}}}}}}} Paula