Monday 4 December 2006

*sigh* another load of no-sends on swap-bot.com. I am so disillusioned with that site although I have done a lot of good swapping on it. It is just so dispiriting when you make something, like a handknit dishcloth, and then get nothing back. I have just signed out of all the swaps that hadn’t started yet and will just slog through the ones I have left and then leave it entirely with atcards.com and the eclectic ATC Yahoo group. Maybe.

I have this internal conflict going on at the moment concerning the throny issue of organisation. As much as it may seem to conflict with my whole life I would really like to be organised. I am always writing lists but then tend to lose them or at least lose interest. The area of swaps is another one where I really want to be organised but am just not getting there. I have an excel file on my PDA but I keep forgetting it. Then I started another list in my notebook but keep forgetting about it. Then I tried writing it down but the paper wasn’t wide enough. My latest decision is to go back to the paper route but (and this is the big BUT {dissimilar to my big ol’butt}) I am going to do it landscape on coloured paper.

I had to break the paragraph there to leave room for the hushed she’s-a’fricking-genius type silence that just happened there. Who’d have seen that one coming?

The Pooch forms one corner of an uneasy triangle in my life at the moment, the other two corners being me and my muvver. Mumsy has asked that the cottage be a laptop free zone at xmas (we are going down to her this year) and Pooch has taken this rather personally. I spoke to Mum about it this morning and she has taken his taking it personally rather personally. Her argument is that it is antisocial. Pooch’s argument is that he wouldn’t dream of asking her not to bring a book or me to bring my knitting. My compromise is that the laptop stays elsewhere for xmas day and is then optional on other days. My argument is also that by his very nature Pooch = antisocial so you can either have him sitting in a corner glowering at the laptop screen or just sitting in a corner glowering. He looks as cute either way although the light from the laptop gives him a kind of ethereal anti-halo which does something for his image although I’m not sure what. All this calls for another entry from the kennel.


(Big Brother announcer’s voiceover…..)
Day 2 in the Pooch Kennel


Set alarm for 6.40am then objected loudly when Byrne got up at 7 and wanted to turn the light on. Even though she brought me a cup of tea I still loathe her. After she had left drank tea with sulky expression on face while counting ways to bring about her downfall. Got up and rearranged two bottles of wine in my 56 bottle winerack. Made my winerack some tea but it didn’t want it so I drank it.

Last night spent some time enumerating the number of meanings of the word ‘Byrne’.

  1. Byrne? – cry of a wounded Pooch (wounds are generally a self-inflicted hangover)
  2. Byrne! – sharp bark such as one uses on a cat when you have caught it munching on the Sunday roast. Used to reprimand and gain ceasing of current action. Usually ineffective.
  3. Byyyyyyyrrrrrnnnne – stealth Pooch gearing up to ask for something.
  4. Byrrrrrne – howl of despair when disco-ordinatedness has made me hit myself in the face again.
  5. Byyyyyrrrrne – exclamation of surprise, such as when Byrne is found building my winerack. Usually denotes pleasure. Also used when discover Byrne has embroidered ‘Byrne was here’ on my underpants.

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Me & my winerack have some tea

6 comments:

RooKnits said...

I love the alternative blog. It made me laugh out loud at work when I saw the picture!

Mary-Lou said...

don't know if it helps, my mum has had 20 years to get used to John glowering at a laptop in the corner ... they get there eventually I guess

Spinningfishwife said...

I have to say, someone sitting hunched over a laptop at a family social occasion IS antisocial, same as with any activity like reading that means you drop out of the social flow. Knitting is Ok, because you can chat and knit. It`s someone sitting deliberately ignoring the company I would hate. Rude.

But if he took the laptop to use in another room part of the time, I don`t see the problem.

Anonymous said...

That's too funny!!! xx

Anonymous said...

Love the blog from the kennel - very funny!

Fred said...

Well one way round is that you both agree not to do your favourite thing for the day. Pooch does no laptop and you do no knitting. That way you will both appreciate the agony the other is suffering.